Date 5 Apr. 2010
I could have lumped all the Sandra Bullock related headlines into one post, but it wouldn't do the story justice. I've seen only eight of The Only Ten Magazines That Matter so far this week, and seven of them have Sandy on the cover. She is officially the new Queen of Heartbreak, and pretenders to the throne like Jennifer Aniston and Elin Nordegren are going to get a break from the vultures of the press for at least this week and probably a little longer.
I open with the most pathetic of the stories, and by that I mean the one that inspires the most pathos. According to OK!, the daughter of Jesse James begged for "mommy to come home", though technically, the little girl's biological mother is the porn star Janine Lindemulder.
I will resort to posting these stories in the morning for the rest of the week, because you are going to feel the need for a shower after reading each and every one.