Thursday, February 25, 2010

Man Slut Alert™:
Matthew Fox cheating with tattooed stripper

Publications: National Enquirer, In Touch
Date: 8 Mar. 2010

This story is perfect for lead-off this week, as it will be on the top of the blog until this afternoon's update.

First we have Matthew Fox as the target. This is the last season of Lost, and who knows what the rest of career will look like? Maybe he'll get lucky like John Corbett from Northern Exposure and get plenty more work. Maybe it will be a Milk Carton for him, like WKRP in Cincinnati was for Gary Sandy.

So the Flagship puts him on the front cover. He's cheating on his wife with a stripper. That's a story we've heard many times before, right?

He's cheating on his wife with a TATTOOED stripper.

This little detail makes the story many times better. As a mathematician, I would estimate that tattooed strippers are approximately a jillion times more interesting than non-tattooed strippers.

Stay classy, National Enquirer!

And a late update. In Touch has the same story and their source is... the aforementioned tattooed stripper.

It just gets better and better, doesn't it?

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